I want you (Je te veux)

•March 27, 2008 • Leave a Comment

I have wondered through all this night
This wounds caused by my harsh words on you
I feel so betrayed when I look into your eyes
And saw nothingness  inside

I wish I could bring back that passion fire

Even though I know that you will probably hate me
Or maybe you would cry because of me
I just can’t help it when I see your cold stare
It hurts to see that the shells around you are trapping you so alone
When I’m just right there, by your side
Alone you cry, alone you try, alone you lie
It breaks my heart to see that you are wounded

And tonight I don’t care anymore
What you will say, what you will think
I’ll just hold you close enough to hear your heartbeat against me
And never let go of you again

That time in the park, when the wind breeze
The moon was shining, you hid yourself
And we played like kids, I can see your smile
You laugh happily and that gaze is jut for me
Before you closed the distant by locking our lips together

Every night I will wonder why did you grow cold
Am I tiring, am I not interesting anymore?
Do your love fade or is it just me paranoid of losing you

But no matter what, I did this all just
Because I love you

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What do I want..?

•March 16, 2008 • Leave a Comment

I want him, Mana-sama.
I want Lust…
I want Pain…
I want him……..

Nonetheless…

Tenshi

•March 16, 2008 • Leave a Comment

dear angeru,
i want you…
can you hear me..?

tenshi,
could you save me before i turn my back from the the lights and darkness again..?

my love,
did you hear my whisper..?

your blue eyes,
have they forgotten about  me…?
no… they haven’t…
in fact.. they have never seen me…

those silken hair,
are they lonely…?
because i was… lonely…

those smooth lips,
can i touch them…?
or cover them with mine…?

that soft neck,
could i give them a mark…?

I love you…
more than words could ever said…
more than my love to myself…
more than anything in this world…
more than my faint memories…

Late at night,
I dreamed of you…
you were soft, tender and beautiful…

When the sun is up,
I was searching for you…
hallucinating…
of you, my dear love…

I love you…
how I wish i could say this to you…
and see you smile…

This heart,
it’s beating for you…
for you and only you…
until it fades…

This soul,
it long for you…

This body,
it aches for you…
wanting to be touched by you…
to be loved by you…

I love you…
I don’t mind saying this everyday…
Don’t mind saying this everytime…

You are beautiful…
The only one…
One of a kind, my death angel…

I love you…
and I’ll be chanting this with you name…
Everytime I see you…

I love you, Mana-sama…

•March 16, 2008 • Leave a Comment

i dont think anyone will read this..
i dont think anyone will ever drop by..

so.. let me pour my heart here..
and grow colder everyday…

•March 16, 2008 • Leave a Comment

*sigh*

and to breathe heavily…
while enjoying this sadistic torture…

who am i now..?
and this sweat..
nervousness..

I got butterflies in my stomach…

poor him…
but i liked it…
it makes breathing harder..
insecurity…

and last…
the wish to be…

fucked.

What I know now

•February 6, 2008 • Leave a Comment

+Life, light and love hurts more than anything+
+Darkness is a place of comfort and safety+
+People lies, they will betray you+
+I am FAKE+
+Blood is either blue, black or red+
+Friendship  is a total fantasy, it doesn’t exist+
+Happiness is just a beautiful lie to believe+
+No one will help or save you from the madness+
+Death is a gift+
+I will burn the white angels wings+
+Lust is overrated+
+Hope and dreams is not going to be a reality+
+It’s better to be cold than try to be warm, but you’re hurting yourself inside so much+
+I am forgotten and forbidden+
+All of my prayers failed to reach their destination+
+Abusing people mentally. That’s what people always do+

-Malilith
-Ila

I missed them.. ;_;

•January 30, 2008 • Leave a Comment

I really missed Drof, Ali and Budo and Tidus and Saita and everyone in Red Motel…

but..

I can’t go there.. ;_;